Longest Thread in Current Events

What's happening that isn't worthy of its own thread?

So France is back to being a NATO member.

Man with flatulence problem gets stabbed
He was eating with a friend in a motel room when he was injured

WACO, Texas - A man was stabbed after causing a stink — literally — in a motel room while eating with a friend, police said.

Five men from the Houston area were sharing a Waco motel room Tuesday night, and two were inside the room eating when one had a flatulence problem, Waco police Officer Steve Anderson said. One man was so upset about the gas that he threw a large knife at him, cutting his leg, and then stabbed him in the chest, Anderson said.

The 35-year-old man was transported to a Waco hospital, where he was treated for what appeared to be non-life threatening injuries, Anderson said.

Jose Braule Ramirez, 33, of Houston, was charged with aggravated assault with a deadly weapon, police said. He was arraigned Wednesday and was being held in the McLennan County Jail on $15,000 bond and placed on an immigration hold, according to jail records. He cannot be released, even if he posts bond, until authorities verify he is in the country legally.

A jail spokeswoman who declined to give her name said she was not allowed to release information on whether Ramirez had an attorney.

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/30116608/

That was a gas to read.

wow

if he's illegal, that was a really, really stupid thing for him to do.

i mean it was stupid anyway. but you know.

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/piracy/5148538/US-rescue-threatens-lives-of-other-pirate-hostages-say-experts.html

I do not like to second guess the men who took the shot, but I wrote a paper on this subject last fall, and I argued against the use of force against these pirates unless they get violent (like killing hostages). I fear they may turn more violent, but I do not think anyone should pay ransoms, or negotiate with these men. Treat them like terrorist, no negotiations.

http://www.contactmusic.com/news.nsf/article/watson%20to%20study%20in%20america_1100409

oh man emma watson going to my school? i thought i'd heard that she decided against brown. there was some craziness when she was visiting or so i heard. man that will be weird if this is serious

i guess its not really news but whatever move it if you want

edit: oh ok this was what i heard http://www.contactmusic.com/news.nsf/article/watson%20hits%20out%20at%20fake%20internet%20profiles_1096880

Driving instructor drunk during lesson

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/30254947/

NEWBURYPORT, Massachusetts - A driving instructor who police say was drunk while giving someone a driving lesson can stay out of jail but will lose his license for a year.

Daniel Winsky, 53, of Salem was convicted Thursday of operating under the influence while giving a lesson from the passenger seat of a car. He was sentenced to 18 months probation but won't be a licensed driver for one year.

Winsky was not behind the wheel during the December 2007 lesson, but prosecutors say he was in control of the passenger side brakes in the specially-fitted car and also moved the wheel during the lesson.
Story continues below ↓advertisement | your ad here

Police pulled Winsky over shortly after a convenience store clerk smelled alcohol on his breath, then saw him enter the auto school's car. Winsky claimed he was not drunk during the lesson.

Woman who kept mom's body and benefits charged

http://www.reuters.com/article/oddlyEnoughNews/idUSTRE5473JM20090508?feedType=RSS&feedName=oddlyEnoughNews&rpc=69

MIAMI (Reuters) - A Florida woman has been indicted for keeping her dead mother's body in a bedroom for six years while collecting more than $200,000 in pension benefits, U.S. prosecutors said on Thursday.

Penelope Sharon Jordan of Sebastian, Florida, was charged by a federal grand jury last week with Social Security fraud and theft, the U.S. Attorney's Office in Miami said.

Police found the decaying body of her mother, Timmie Jordan, on a bed in a spare bedroom at the mother's home in late March, when they were called to investigate a report of nuisance cats.

Penelope Jordan told police her mother had died in 2003.

The indictment alleged Jordan concealed her mother's death in order to receive both her U.S. Social Security benefits and her military survivor's benefit.

Jordan collected $61,415 from Social Security and $176,461 from the military pension during the six years, prosecutors said.

She could face up to 15 years in prison.

Local media reported that the 61-year-old woman told police her mother died of old age and she kept the remains because she couldn't afford burial expenses. An autopsy found no signs of foul play.

According to a local paper, police found many cats on Jordan's property but she denied they were hers.

jordan and peter andre are splitting and have asked for privacy
fuck them

(this will only mean something to english people i presume, and i hope, otherwise they are doing better than i hoped)

Braddock wrote: and have asked for privacy

yeah right!...we'll be sick hearing about it once they find out who's offering the best deal

oznz wrote:Woman who kept mom's body and benefits charged

http://www.reuters.com/article/oddlyEnoughNews/idUSTRE5473JM20090508?feedType=RSS&feedName=oddlyEnoughNews&rpc=69

MIAMI (Reuters) - A Florida woman has been indicted for keeping her dead mother's body in a bedroom for six years while collecting more than $200,000 in pension benefits, U.S. prosecutors said on Thursday.

Penelope Sharon Jordan of Sebastian, Florida, was charged by a federal grand jury last week with Social Security fraud and theft, the U.S. Attorney's Office in Miami said.

Police found the decaying body of her mother, Timmie Jordan, on a bed in a spare bedroom at the mother's home in late March, when they were called to investigate a report of nuisance cats.

Penelope Jordan told police her mother had died in 2003.

The indictment alleged Jordan concealed her mother's death in order to receive both her U.S. Social Security benefits and her military survivor's benefit.

Jordan collected $61,415 from Social Security and $176,461 from the military pension during the six years, prosecutors said.

She could face up to 15 years in prison.

Local media reported that the 61-year-old woman told police her mother died of old age and she kept the remains because she couldn't afford burial expenses. An autopsy found no signs of foul play.

According to a local paper, police found many cats on Jordan's property but she denied they were hers.

One time I was watching Snapped and they profiled this chick who suffocated her mother with a plastic bag, then shoved the corpse into a trash can and duct-taped it closed and put it in a storage unit and her mom would get social security and the chick would cash the checks and live off of them and stuff

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irene wrote:

oznz wrote:Woman who kept mom's body and benefits charged

http://www.reuters.com/article/oddlyEnoughNews/idUSTRE5473JM20090508?feedType=RSS&feedName=oddlyEnoughNews&rpc=69

MIAMI (Reuters) - A Florida woman has been indicted for keeping her dead mother's body in a bedroom for six years while collecting more than $200,000 in pension benefits, U.S. prosecutors said on Thursday.

Penelope Sharon Jordan of Sebastian, Florida, was charged by a federal grand jury last week with Social Security fraud and theft, the U.S. Attorney's Office in Miami said.

Police found the decaying body of her mother, Timmie Jordan, on a bed in a spare bedroom at the mother's home in late March, when they were called to investigate a report of nuisance cats.

Penelope Jordan told police her mother had died in 2003.

The indictment alleged Jordan concealed her mother's death in order to receive both her U.S. Social Security benefits and her military survivor's benefit.

Jordan collected $61,415 from Social Security and $176,461 from the military pension during the six years, prosecutors said.

She could face up to 15 years in prison.

Local media reported that the 61-year-old woman told police her mother died of old age and she kept the remains because she couldn't afford burial expenses. An autopsy found no signs of foul play.

According to a local paper, police found many cats on Jordan's property but she denied they were hers.

One time I was watching Snapped and they profiled this chick who suffocated her mother with a plastic bag, then shoved the corpse into a trash can and duct-taped it closed and put it in a storage unit and her mom would get social security and the chick would cash the checks and live off of them and stuff

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makes me wonder why i stick with student loans

however, this is worse - mr edmund kemper

In April 1973, Kemper battered his mother to death with a pick hammer as she slept. He decapitated her, raped her headless body, and used her head as a dartboard after putting her vocal cords in the garbage disposal.

I just got in from work and noticed my polling card pinned up in the kitchen.....there's apparently a European election (and local elections) on today. What a non-event this is! I haven't got a clue who's standing or what policies are important and I never used to be so ignorant about politics.
I can't really be arsed going out to vote but I might be tempted just to see what sort of ridiculous parties have sprung to life since the last election.

Just checked the BBC and can find nothing about the local elections in Scotland but these are some of the less traditional parties standing in the UK for the European parliament. Decisions, decisions......

Animals Count
Fair Play Fair Trade Party
Jury Team
Libertas
Mebyon Kernow
No2EU
Pensioners Party
The Peace Party
The Roman Party
Wai D
Yes 2 Europe

rosey wrote:Just checked the BBC and can find nothing about the local elections in Scotland

that's because I'm an eejit and there are none ............... should have known the southerners would get more out of this election malarkey than us

party names can be utterly ridiculous

back when i was in high school we had this one project in us history class i think where we got into groups and were all assigned different parties to do reports on and they were all so ridiculous. this one was our favorite while in the library doing research i dont think it was my party but one of my friends was doing it i guess. seriously you have to take a look at this website to realize they have no business being a political party: http://www.lightparty.com and this is still the best part of that website: http://www.lightparty.com/Artainment/LightShow.html seriously i could not make a link that was more telling than that so i just left it as the url

i think my group's party was the green party so probably one of the most legit there was i dunno i dont remember maybe it was something else. oh and my favorite party as presentations go was the one whose presidential candidate's name was R. U. Sirius

ouch, had to close down quickly there before I had a seizure.

I ended up wandering down to vote. The voting slip was long enough to be classed as wallpaper and in a lovely shade of dirty yellow. The guy who checked me in had a shirt in an identical shade and I complimented him on being so well matched.
When I got into the booth I remembered, again, that I really need to get my eyes tested and get some reading glasses. So I swooped on some party in the middle and left my mark. I reckon I was safe from accidently voting Conservative ......unless there were a whole load of weird parties beginning with B.........

badger's rights in europe party
ban soup spoons party
bananas can bend however much they want party
belgium isn't just about chocolate party
brussels - leave our sprouts alone party
Broons coat's on a shoogly peg party

right, the address to congress on health care... obama is a badass. i wish the rest of this country's politicians would stop behaving like spoiled children and catch up with him.

I have no idea what's going on with any of that

i dont pay enough (read: any) attention to politics

if i could find my admin panel i'd move this whole forum to the hall of shame.

my thoughts, hospitals should be like police stations or fire house, non for profit, and tax payer funded, their when any American needs them. I am will to pay for it with my tax dollars even if it call for a tax hike.

yeah i mean, i'm sure plenty of times someone causes their house to catch on fire by ignoring the stove or whatever, but that doesn't stop the fire department from coming and putting the goddamn fire out.

God, i post like a idiot. typos all over, and I am studying English.